The worst possible hour of the night and you can't get back to sleep, do you know the feeling? If you have experienced this than you know that alone feeling I am feeling. You can have your husband, siblings, parents, and 20 kids all sleeping in the same house, but you will feel so alone when you're the only one awake in the middle of the night.
I am awake tonight, just like I am every night since my newest son came into this world. He goes to sleep at 7, 8 or 9pm... and will wake up at 2, 3 or 4am... and why do you ask? Simple, he's hungry! So what do you do when your baby is hungry? You feed him of course! The consequence to being a good mommy though, is sleepless nights. Make no mistake, you'll find it all worth it when your child is older but while they're young, life is rough. The only way to survive it is to figure out what works for you!
So what works for me? Thinking about one thing - Time!
Sometimes the only way to get through chaos, is to create order.... Everything, from how long it takes to dry laundry to when the bus arrives to pick up your child is calculated... Right now I'm staring at the clock and it's saying 3:45am... one person would look at this and say, 'It's time for bed', I, on the other hand, am saying '3 more hours before my son wakes up for his next feeding, 4 more hours before my daughter's bus arrives, 4 and a half more hours before I have to drive my older son to school', and so on and so forth...
Everything in this house is scheduled. It might not be written on the fridge, but after doing laundry for your family over a decade, dishes, making their lunches, scheduling their doctor appointments, cleaning up their toys, drawing their baths, you learn that everything has a time limit. Laundry - 1 hour, Dishes - 30 minutes to 1 hour, planning dinner - 2 to 3 hours, school - 4 to 8 hours, Appointments - 1 to 3 hours... etc...
These are the things going through my mind at this very moment. I'm saying to myself right now, it's now almost 4am, I have 3 more hours to get things done before my youngest son wakes up and I need to get my older two children ready for school... then after they go to school, I have 4 more hours to fit in dishes, laundry, vacuuming, personal appointments, feeding and playing with my youngest son, before I need to pick my older son up from school, and then another 4 hours to fit in other appointments, taking care of both sons, finishing the housework before I have to pick up my daughter from extracurricular activities... and then more possible appointments for my children after their schooling is done, checking over their schoolwork, homework, planning dinner, cooking that dinner, baths, more cleaning and playing...
There is just so much to be done every day and if you can't put it in order, the stress can be an enormous burden....
So although I do feel alone at this time of night, I also feel like I can breathe.
In these next few hours I can take a shower, sit down with a cup of coffee and watch a few netflix shows quietly by myself without 3 children screaming in my ear or feeling like I'm wasting daylight in front of my TV...
...knowing I've already slept for 6-7 hours in anticipation that I would be up about this time anyway...
Now here I am, on my computer, writing this blog about time, knowing there are many more out there feeling the same way, or close to it.
And how do I know this?
Easy, because when children come into this world, your life takes a back seat and you learn to do anything and everything to make sure they are taken care of without them knowing the stresses you're going through to take care of them.
Time being the biggest one - watching that ticking clock - you learn to appreciate every minute!
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